I know I’m probably going to Hell for finding ANY humor in this but I can’t help it
I’ll start by saying that this is something I deal with on a day-to-day basis as my lovely, wonderful, and perfect Wife still has trouble with “Left” and “Right” from time to time…but I digress.
As I’m standing in my office listening to the messages on the answering machine a patient happens by my office door. If you’re not familiar with the layout of our office you wouldn’t know that the patient restroom is the door immediately after mine if you’re coming from the reception/front desk/check out/optical area….on the LEFT side of the hall.
As it happens, said patient is legally blind and totally dependent on his caregiver/guide to lead him in the right direction. After seeing the doctor and prior to leaving the patient had to use the facilities. I first noticed his guide (we’ll call her, “Radar”) as she passed my office and stopped just past the entrance to the restroom. From there she uttered the command…clearly…”One more door then it’s the next one on the right”.
Not that I eavesdrop all of the time but if they’re in earshot…
I began reciting in my head, “Left…Left…Left…”
Turns out when the good Lord took our patient’s sight he did not bless him, instead, with the ability to read minds. He didn’t pick up my signal…
…with his walking stick he identifies the door to my office…and being the trusting type proceeds past it (as instructed), promptly turns RIGHT and runs into the wall.
Fortunately he was going really slowly so I don’t think there were any injuries.
It went sort of like this:
Radar: “One more door then on the right”
Blind Guy: Tap..Tap..Tap..Tap..Tap..Tap..CRASH!
Blind Guy: Tap…Tap…Click…Creek…Creek…Slam…Click…
- Why Capital One SUCKS!!
- Advanced Beginner Tech Support (or What the Hell Does This Button Do?)
- F'in Squirrels
- Thoughts around Christmas
- The smartest man alive...until...
- Karma is a Roach on the McDonald's Drive-Thru Window
- Bus Stop Commando
- Learning the Hard Way
- No Such Thing as a "Dog Year"
- When Good Fruit Goes Bad
- Fantasy Football
- Weird South Carolina Weather
- Fruit-Flavored Fruit
- Magic 8 Ball
- UPS is AMAZING!
- Vacation - Day #1
- Jordan's Musings
- Religious Tolerance
- Rant 05/04/09